Teen Girl Squad Stories!
by Snicklin
Summary: Teen Girl Squad! Cheerleader goes to a date with Brett Bretterson! So-And-So and What's Her Face go on the ride of their lives! The sweet irony of four tickets to Asparagus And You is heard! Er... actually it's just Tompkins. Pleeeeeeease read and review!
1. Fhgwfest

Teen Girl Squad

**Teen Girl Squad!**

**Cheerleader: Wrapped up in boy chasing!**

**So-And-So: Wrapped up in not standing next to Cheerleader!**

**What's Her Face: Wrapped up in toilet paper!**

**The Ugly One: Wrapped up!**

**What's Her Face: G'monin, gals! Today we-**

**Cheerleader: Shut up! I'm the only one who'll start this comic with a sentence, and always will be!! (Kicks What's Her Face out of the scene)**

**What's Her Face: 'M S'rry!**

**Cheerleader: And don't replace vowels with anonymous apostrophes, either! Ahem… good morning, gals! We're going to the '09 Fhgwfest, t'd'y! (Pauses) Oh, no! I went against my own rool! (Fugitiv'd!) Ow!! My independence!!**

**So-And-So: Well, I was able to make out the "Fhgwfest '09" part… (Pauses)**

**All the girls: We're going to the 2009 Fhgwfest!!**

**(At the what they said…)**

**The Ugly One: Hi, really, really hot boy who is totally real and is totally not a cardboard box with a drawing of Quarterman's face taped to it! How's being a totally real, totally hot boy going? (Waits for response) Really? Are you pumped for this year's Fhgwfest? (Waits for response) What's that you say? You want to go on that ride over there with me? Oookay… if you saywithyourownmouthso… (Police appear)**

**R&B Guy: So-And-So and What's Her Face are gazing in "What the heck was that?"-ness**

**So-And-So and What's Her Face are gazing in "What the heck was that?"-ness**

**She may be crazy, talking to a cardboard box disguised as Quarterman**

**But now she's being taken to the foot-away crazy house**

**I think they're gonna take her to a foot-away crazy toooooooown! **

**Electric Guitar: Bwiiiiiiiiiiiim!**

**What's Her Face: That was weird.**

**So-And-So: Well, at least we're still here. Wanna go to those Bowels of Trogdor ride over yonder?**

**What's Her Face: Meh.**

**(At the rides…)**

**Man: (Voiced by Senior Cardgage) Haldo, woman and woman. Are you participating in not-going-out-with-a-boy-who-is-a-cardboard-box-with-a-picture-of-Quarterman's-face-taped-to-it-ing for the 360?**

**So-And-So: 360?! No way!! I can't do with one of those glucose-drink commercials again! (Pulls out two tickets) We're just here for the Bawls' o' Trogdor, thank you muy much! (So-And-So and What's Her Face start walking toward the coasters)**

**Man: Ala mode your way into a seat. Pull those serpents tight. Don't throw up on your-**

**(Aaaaand at the coaster…)**

**So-And-So: O-M-G! O-M-G! O-M-G! This is coing to be C-O-T-M-L!**

**What's Her Face: Cotml?**

**So-And-So: Wait, what? (Ride starts)**

**Both girls: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!! Stuff-you-ate-and-can't-keep-in-out-of-your-mouth-ia!!**

**So-And-So: I'm about to throw up!!**

**What's Her Face: I'm about to say hi to the boy sitting in the front row! (So-And-So stares at What's Her Face, What's Her Face smiles)**

**Front-Row Boy: Aaaah, good tiiiiiiiiiiiiimes!**

**(Stomach mouth! Everyone's skeletons fall out of their mouths.)**

**Front-Row Boy: Best ride eveeeeer!**

**So-And-So: We should do this again, sometiiiiiiime!**

**What's Her Face: I can't feel my leeeeegs!**

**(After the ride…)**

**Man: Here's your skeleton's back. (Hands over **

**So-And-So and What's Her Face's skeletons)**

**It's Over!**

**Homestar's Voice: Booooo!**


	2. Spy

Teen Girl Squad

**Teen Girl Squad!**

**Cheerleader: Cheerleader for president!**

**So-And-So: So-And-So for vice president!**

**What's Her Face: What's Her Face for museum exhibit tour guide!**

**The Ugly One: The Ugly One for shoe polisher!**

**Cheerleader: I got an invitation from this boy inviting me to this dance show!**

**What's Her Face: Can we come? It sounds like there's… a lot of boys…**

**Cheerleader: Jenkins, no! This is a private club for members/invitees only! It's about time you went on your own while I have a vacation! Grood-bye! **

**(Walks away)**

**So-And-So: What IS she up to…? Let's follow her, girls!**

**The Ugly One: Since when did you get to call us "girls"?**

**So-And-So: Since Cheerleader left! Now get your tight, black vinyl suits on! We're going… through the vents!**

**(At the club…)**

**Cheerleader: 'Sap, fellow parsons? I'm a desperate girl looking for a certain somebody who sent me (Takes out invitation card) this card as an invitation to this certain-certain club. You dig?**

**Boy1: You Dig… that's a good band name.**

**Boy2: I like video games!! Who else likes video games?! I like video games!!**

**Boy3: Hello, I am looking for the one called Cheerleader…?**

**Cheerleader: Cheerleader?! That's me! (And they lived happily almost after!)**

**(Meanwhile…)**

**So-And-So: (Whispering) Alright, girls! Let's get ready to be…**

**All the girls: (Whispering) Sooo stealthy!**

**(In the vents…)**

**So-And-So: Alright, these gloves should make us quiet while we crawl through. Keep off the green spots. Stepping on a crack breaks your mom's back. I have some gum in my pocket if anyone wants. Alright, let's move!**

**(Meanwhile…)**

**Cheerleader: So, know any dance moves you'd like to show me? I's got plenty!**

**Boy3: ****Siete completamente un caldo, ****li****avete****lasciati****fare****il****ballo**** di ****Amore****.**

**Cheerleader: Oooh! Japanese! I like that! (Giggles)**

**(Meanwhile…)**

**The Ugly One: See anything yet? It's getting hard to breathe…**

**So-And-So: Not yet! My GPS (A cardboard box with a paper that says "Push-Button" taped to it) tells me we're almost there!**

**What's Her Face: Are you sure that's not your cell phone? I think I just stepped in some green stuff… (Gingivitiiiiiiiiiiss… 'd! Shows an image of **

**What's Her Face's mouth exploding) Ow, fhgwgads! (Dies)**

**So-And-So: Look! A vent! Man, does this GPS do magic, or what? (Looks through vent) Look at her. Rubbing her face in the fact that she's pretending that she doesn't need support!**

**The Ugly One: Actually, I think she's just getting a drink.**

**So-And-So: Oh… I… I knew that. Maybe if we can- (Falls through vents) AaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaawhyamIstillfallingaaaaaaaaaaah-(KRBOOSH! So-And-So died)**

**Cheerleader: Huh? What's going on, here?**

**The Ugly One: Uuuum… we're spying on you? (Allworkandnoplaymakesjackadullboy, Allworkandnoplaymakesjackadullboy, Allworkandnoplaymakesjackadullboy… REDRUM'D!! **

**The Ugly One drowns in fruit punch)**

**Cheerleader: I never knew any of them, I swear.**

**Boy3:** **Quello è giusto, io capisce.**

**Boy1: Cheerleader, you are totally hot. Will you join me in the making of band names?**

**Boy3: What are you talking about? She likes ME and me only! I'm the one who sent her that card!**

**Boy1: Well… you're a big dummy! Why would she like you, anyway? Big Dummy… that's a good band name.**

**Cheerleader: Enough!! I shall host a wrestling match to see which boy is better! Then he may go out with me!**

**(At the wrestling match!!)**

**Cheerleader: Hulloy, people and people and boys and children! Welcome to the boy-versus-boy-fighting-to-have-the-girl match! Our first contestant… Brett Bretterson! (Boy3) And his challenger, Ragamuffin! (Boy1)**

**Boy1: You're going down, Bretterson!**

**Boy3: Not if you go down first!**

**Cheerleader: Rule number one… (Takes out rulebook and glasses) well this stuff sucks. (Throws rulebook and glasses away) Okay, fight! (Boy1 and Boy3 clash in a blur of fists and balls of smoke) Wow… now this is what I call entertainment! (Brings out popcorn)**

**Boy3: I hate you!**

**Boy1: I hate you more!**

**Boy3: You're a dummy!**

**Boy1: Well, you're dumber than that!**

**Boy3: Well, you're dumber than an ameba!**

**Boy1: Well, you're dumber than the dumbest thing in the universe!**

**Boy3: Well, you're dumber than that!**

**Boy1: Well, you're… de… daugh!!**

**Cheerleader: Wow, this is wawesome! They should put this on pay-per-view! (Overtime!! That guy who arrow'd The Ugly One in the first episode of TGS threw a clock at Cheerleader and killed her!) Ow, I'm too young to my time's up!!**

**Boy1: Oh, great! Now neither of us can have her! (Both Boy1 and Boy3 look at each other evilly)**

**It's Over!**

**(I really hope this one was funny! Please comment me if you think I can do better!)**


	3. Halloween

Teen Girl Squad Halloween Special

**Teen Girl Squad Halloween Special!!**

**Cheerleader: Afraid of Quarterman!**

**So-And-So: Afraid of blueberry-scented hairspray!**

**What's Her Face: Afraid of Charles Schwab!**

**The Ugly One: Afraid of nail salons?**

**Cheerleader: (Emerges from pumpkin, lightning cracks around her) Goooooooood-morning, gals! Today we gonna get ready to be…**

**All the girls: Sooooo spooky!**

**So-And-So: I'm gonna be toilet paper, this Halloween!**

**The Ugly One: I'm gonna be Moby Dick!**

**What's Her Face: I'm gonna be Andrew Ryan this Decemberween! (Everyone looks at What's Her Face)**

**Cheerleader: Oooooohkay… listens, gals! We gonna get ready for tomorrow which is Halloweeeeeeeeeen! (Back-crack'd! Lightning strikes Cheerleader, Cheerleader goes into shock. All the girls stare at the corpse)**

**The Ugly One: Won't be seeing her for a while.**

**(The next night…)**

**So-And-So: Ugh! This is ridiculous! I don't know whether to wear Bounty or Charmin Ultra-Strong!**

**So-And-So Mommersson: (Echoing voice sounding like it's coming from a cave) Will, hurry up! I'm not gonna look at you all day! Make your choice and get out!!**

**So-And-So: Oh, you have no taste in pop culture, So-And-So Mommersson! (Da Boot!)**

**(Meanwhile…)**

**The Ugly One: (Pirate voice) Avast, ye lubbs! I come as The Ugly One dressed as a whale, in surch to fulfill me ever-growing need for sugar nuggets! (Changes back to normal voice) So gimme, gimme! I ain't gonna stand here all day!**

**Bearded Woman: Shure, lil' dalin' go'gis, halp yo'self. (Brings out bowl of candy. ****Sucrerie de toileeeeeeette? The bearded woman died)**

**The Ugly One: (Walking away) Movin' on!**

**So-And-So: How'd it go?**

**The Ugly One: Dunnoh. (Cotton swab'd! A bunny beat The Ugly One with an ear and she died) Ow, my beerwax!**

**What's Her Face: What's a beerwax?**

**So-And-So: Dunnoh. Something to do with grammar. (Nanny Grams! An old woman appears out of nowhere)**

**Old Woman: Beat staaaaate!!**

**So-And-So: (Holding her ears dramatically) Noooooooooooo!**

**(Meanwhile…)**

**Cheerleader: It sure is dark AND spooky here… HELLO? So-And-So? What's Her Face? **Moby Dick?

**(Again meanwhile…)**

**What's Her Face: Where is Cheerleader? She said she'd be here by now!**

**So-And-So: I hope she hurriiiiiiies!**

**Old Woman: I'm degrees at thirteen back in my day!**

**So-And-So: Aaaaaaaack!**

**(Yet another meanwhile…)**

**Cheerleader: Where's the way out of these spooky woods? It's getting daaaark! (Arrow'd guy emerges in the background dressed as an owl)**

**Cheerleader: Oh, this is too much! This forest is probably infested with ticks and owls! Plus it's an ideal place for forest fires! (Larry Duct'd! -Strong Bad struggles to pronounce- A roll of monster tape whacks Cheerleader with ****Andrew Ryan, complete with a Big Daddy diving suit! And of course Cheerleader died) Ow, the sensemake!**

**(You know what I'm going to say…)**

**Old Woman: And the tension shippers back in my day!**

**What's Her Face: Waaaaait a second! (Bwowowowow) My spider sense tells me that Cheerleader just got taken-to by an Andrew Ryan!**

**So-And-So: Does that mean anything?**

**What's Her Face: I'm guessing she died.**

**So-And-So: Oh, well… that's one less… sssssss… to worry about. NOW LET'S GO TRICK'R TREATING FOR REALLY!**

**Two Girl Squad! Not that you'd care!!**

**So-And-So and What' Her Face! (Boooooooo!)**

**So-And-So: Ding-dong! No one's looking!**

**Man: (Answers door) I see you and you want candy, don't you?**

**What's Her Face: I was ezpecting a more positive welcome…**

**Man: You mean expecting?**

**What's Her Face: No, ezpecting.**

**Man: Whatever, here's your candy. (Dumps candy in their bags)**

**So-And-So: Okay by- (Man shuts door on her hand) Ow!**

**(At the next house…)**

**So-And-So: Knock knock knock! I'm getting paid for this!**

**Death: (Answers door) Hheeeeeeelllllloooooooo?**

**So-And-So: Hey, hey! I'm a trick-or-treater! Gimme candy or gimme death!**

**Death: I am death.**

**What's Her Face: (Shuts the door on death) Whoops! Been here long enough!**

**(Down the road…)**

**So-And-So: Looks like a long way to the next house! Wanna play I Spy?**

**What's Her Face: Sure… uuuh, I spy a red thing.**

**So-And-So: That tree over there?**

**What's Her Face: Oh, guess it's your turn.**

**So-And-So: I spy with my beady, badly-illustrated eye… something… plastic!**

**What's Her Face: That manikin over there?**

**So-And-So: Doof! You got it right!**

**What's Her Face: I spy… something beardy.**

**So-And-So: That hobo over there?**

**Hobo: My life as a teenage girl!**

**What's Her Face: Really! You're a psychic! (The hobo goes into his giant golden house with his limozeen parked in the driveway as What's Her Face and So-And-So walk away)**

**(At the next house…)**

**So-And-So: Bang bang bang! I'm desperate to find out!**

**Woman: (Answers door) Who's there?! Jeffery, is that you?!**

**What's Her Face: Give us what we came here for! We do not accept tricks!**

**Woman: Gah! Take it! Take it and leave!! (Drops a dead goose on the doorstep and slams the door)**

**Both the girls: Anserini carcass!**

**(This is the last house!)**

**What's Her Face: Nock nock nock! Did I spell that right?**

**Chair: (Answers door) Hello?**

**So-And-So: Ooooh, the butt-print warming kind! That's cool with us! Give us some human food! And make sure there's lots of high fructose corn syrup!**

**Chair: Sorry. All I got is this bottle of Listerine.**

**What's Her Face: It's all cool, it's all cool. We could put some smart rinse through its paces. C'mon, What's It's Face, we're done. (Stampede of shoppers! What's Her Face and So-And-So died)**

**Iiiiiit's Over! (Said as if saying "Heeeeere's Johnny!")**


	4. The Movies

**Teen Girl Squad!**

**Cheerleader: Pop Rock!**

**So-And-So: R&B/Soul!**

**What's Her Face: Reggae and Hip-Hop!**

**The Ugly One: Latin Riff?**

**Cheerleader: Did you hear that girls? It's the sound of the sweet irony of these (Pulls out tickets) four tickets to the movies and theaters, tonight!**

**What's Her Face: Actually, it sounds like Tompkins stomping on bubble wrap.**

**Tompkins: Die hard and thoroughly!!!!**

**Cheerleader: Ooooookay… Well, let's get ready, anyways, girls! It starts at… ooooooooh… eight o' clock! Now, be there!**

**The Ugly One: Sounds cool! What movies are out? (Ironing'd! Arrow'd guy ironed The Ugly One to death) Ow, my pronunciation!**

**Cheerleader: Well, that's a reference that I wouldn't know or care to know about–come on girls! We're going to see **_**Asparagus and You!**_

**So-And-So: Awww! Another educational movie about fashion?**

**Cheerleader: Yes! It's practice for the life as a girl! This is the whole reason I bought you (Pulls out tickets) these tickets!**

**So-And-So & What's Her Face: Soooooo good!**

**At So & So's house…**

**So-And-So: Uh-huh, yeah! Tonight's the night, Brett! Tonight I'm going quality over quantity! I'm using… (Bulls out hairspray bottle with a picture of a burglar's face on it and holds it up to the camera) pepper-scented hairspray!!!**

**At What's Her Face's house…**

**What's Her Face: I can't believe I get to buy my own popcorn! I think this is going to be a night worth remembering! Science Fiction Greg got resurrected from the grave and says he'll be at the movies, tonight!**

**Squirrel: Quit talkin' to yourself. You look like a nut! Mmmmmm… nuts…**

**(What's Her Face looks at squirrel with a worried face)**

**At the movies…**

**Cheerleader: Where the pfargtl are those girls? They should be here right now!**

**(Cuts to scene of a bunch of cars crammed on top of one another with So-And-So's car in the middle, then cuts back to Cheerleader at the stand)**

**Cheerleader: (Takes out cell phone, dials numbers, and puts it on her ear) Heeeeeloooooo? Yes. You should be here by now. Where are you?**

**What's Her Face: (Breaks out of back window with a man standing next to her) I'm heeeeere!**

**Cheerleader: What's Her Face? What do you think you're doing breaking through the back window?**

**What's Her Face: Oh, this is how I usually come in! (Giant piece of glass falls on man next to her)**

**Cheerleader: Oh, that's cool. I dig it.**

**What's Her Face: Yeah, no hard feelings.**

**Cheerleader: I was talking to my b-FRIEND, thank you very much! Oh, and get me some chips on the way, okay?**

**What's Her Face: Sure.**

**Cheerleader: I was talking on the phone! Hold on a sec.**

**What's Her Face: Okay?**

**Cheerleader: Again, on the phone! Jeez! You need to know when I'm talking to someone else when you see it!**

**What's Her Face: But I can't-**

**Cheerleader: Phooone!**

**(What's Her Face gives an annoyed grunt)**

**Meanwhileon the road…**

**So-And-So: Soooo… anyone know any good jokes?**

**Man: (In bottom car) The cow jumped over the moon.**

**Sheep: (In top car) Baaah.**

**So-And-So: No, jokes. Like the kind you tell?**

**Man: An honest-to-dog, no.**

**Sheep: Moooooo- (Quickly cuts to the movies)**

**At the movies…**

**Cheerleader: Since So-And-So hasn't been here for five hours, I'll just redeem these tickets without her. (Giant robot breaks through roof carrying So-And-So, puts her on the ground, and flies away) So-And-So! Where have you been?**

**So-And-So: Nowhere important. Now let's get this show on the road!**

**(As the three girls walk away, a bunch of muggers terrorize the booth)**

**Cheerleader: (Hands over tickets) Here you go!**

**Man: (Tears up tickets carelessly) Second-to-fifth down to the fourteenth right.**

**What's Her Face: (Girls walk away) Thanks!**

**At the movie…**

**(What's Her Face is sitting next to Science-Fiction Greg, complete with two bolts on opposite sides of neck, and b-FRIEND is sitting between Cheerleader and So-And-So)**

**What's Her Face: I need to go get popcorn. (Walks away)**

**So-And-So: b-FRIEND, could you scoot over a bit?**

**Cheerleader: What do you think you're doing?! b-FRIEND cannot be demanded to follow such-**

**Person: Ssshhh!**

**So-And-So: I was just a little uncomfortable sitting next to someone else's boyfriend when I've got my own boyfriend.**

**Person: SSSHHH!**

**What's Her Face: I'm back! (Sits down) Oh, this is my favorite part!**

**So-And-So: You've seen this before?**

**What's Her Face: Oh, yeah. (La Cucaracha'd! A cockroach broke What's Her Face's leg)**

**Person: SSSHHH!!**

**After the movie…**

**Cheerleader: Excluding all the parts of when that guy with big, white teeth had to climb to the top of Mount Everest, that movie was pretty good! Wouldn't you agree, b-FRIEND?**

**b-FRIEND: Perfect, wouldn't you say?**

**Cheerleader: I strongly agree! Just as strong as you are! Er… well, nothing can compare to your strongness!**

**So-And-So: Well… at least it was educational…**

**Science-Fiction Greg: I still never got a chance to play War-Karts with her… she was so… into it. (Spreads wings and flies into heaven)**

**It's Over!**


	5. Advertising

**Teen Girl Squad!**

**Cheerleader: Weight-loss fruit blend!**

**So-And-So: Cherry Coke!**

**What's Her Face: Diet Brown!**

**The Ugly One: Laboratory serum?**

**Cheerleader: I did it! I finally found out how to get summa dem hunks!**

**What's Her Face: You always say that, and it never happens.**

**So-And-So: Yeah, why can't you start reading those books?**

**Cheerleader: Cheerleader no need books! I got this! (Points to brain)**

**So-And-So: Yet it seems to malfunction-**

**Cheerleader: Clam up and listen to my plan, you uggs! We're gonna ADVERTISE for them! Now, we can get the best trout at the beach! Meet me at What's Her Face's parents' basement's basement and we'll get to work!**

**At What's Her Face's parents' basement's basement…**

**Cheerleader: I like glitter. Put on a lot of glitter! Licorice-scented markers are good, too! C'mon! We gotta make this attractive!**

**What's Her Face: Uh, Cheerleader, you're standing in that dead rat that I found here last week.**

**Cheerleader: We have no time for talking about red vats, What's Her Face! We gotta hurry!**

**So-And-So: Relax. It's not like there's a deadline!**

**Cheerleader: Anything's possible when it comes to hunks, So-And-So! Work harder, you're wasting my time!**

**What's Her Face: Um, wo-**

**Cheerleader: NO ONE TALKS TO THE CHEERLEADER UNLESS YOU ARE ISSUED PERMISSION!!!**

**What's Her Face: (Sighs) Permission to speak, Cheerleader?**

**Cheerleader: (Snottily) Yes, you may.**

**What's Her Face: Um, wouldn't we have to make like a thousand of these posters to get a boy's interest?**

**Cheerleader: You're right. You're gonna have to work TWICE as hard!**

**So-And-So: Nice work, What's Her Face.**

**The Ugly One: Oh, well. At least we'll be getting somewhere. Right, girls? (Zooms out to reveal empty chairs) Girls? (Zooms out more to the whole basement that is now empty) (In a now echoing voice) Hello?**

**One hour later…**

**(So-And-So and What's Her Face's arms are tied up running on a giant hamster wheel)**

**So-And-So: What exactly is this hamster wheel supposed to do?**

**Cheerleader: As far as I know, experiment monkeys were used to run on them.**

**What's Her Face: So there's no purpose of running on this wheel?**

**Cheerleader: Remember when I said that sweating was against several of my religions-**

**So-And-So: (Deadline'd! a line with a moustache killed So-And-So with a revolver) Ow, my occasion of achievement on time!!!**

**Cheerleader: Screw this. One poster is enough! (Pointless advertising'd! A hamster took a katana to Cheerleader and she died)**

**What's Her Face: That was random, not funny, and unethical. I'm starting to think our deaths are… (An eraser appears and starts erasing What's Her Face) What are you doing?! Stop it!! Noooooo!!! (Erased from existence! What's Her Face died)**

**The Ugly One: Well… I guess I'm the only girl left… again… oh, hey! Look! A reasonable pile o' used nerds! (Nerd walks by) Oh, take me by my heart, 1337manofnerds!**

**1337manofnerds: Shust up! Is it not obvious that I hate people that are clearly lamer than me?**

**The Ugly One: (Facepalm'd!** **The Arrow'd guy dressed up like the guy from the Facepalmed picture is well, facepalming) (His hand is on The Ugly One's body) Vegeta, what does it say about my insurance?**

**Vegeta: It's over negative nine thousaaaaaaa- (Coughs twice) (User meme'd! The Ugly One and Vegeta died)**

**Strong Bad's voice: That wasn't all that I expected. Let's try that again.**

**Teen Girl Squad!**

**Cheerleader: Weight-loss fruit blend!**

**So-And-So: Cherry Coke!**

**What's Her Face: Diet Brown!**

**The Ugly One: Laboratory serum?**

**Cheerleader: Umm... this is where I'd normally say something, but I fear for my life-**

So-And-So: _**I'LL DO IT!!!**_** Let's go to the library!!! (Strong Badia Free Library'd! A bookshelf fell on So-And-So) Et tu, fine literacy!!!!**

**Cheerleader: Girls, let's...**

The Ugly One: We've been through this loads of times! We're just going to die anyway, and this background music is driving me crazy! (Background music ceases) I mean, why would anyone even think of this? And what about... (ANGRY WRATH OF ALL THE TEEN GIRL SQUAD VIEWERS...'D! The Ugly One died in some extremely violent way that involves critics) (Background music plays again)

**Cheerleader: Well, it's just you and me, So-And-So. I can't believe The Ugly One thinks that we're actually in some kind of comic book, devised by a stubby shirtless man wi- (Strong Bad makes loud coughing noises) (Book gutter'd! Cheerleader and So-And-So got stuck in the gutter of a book and suffocated to death)**

**Strong Bad's voice: Man. Too bad I only have four girls to kill… hey! That gives me an idea… announcing the newest addition to the TGS… Salary! (A girl in a sparkly dress appears) No. That's not right… (Salary's head pops off) (Salary disappears) So much for that idea.**

**It's Over!**


End file.
